May 30, 2008

whose hair? not hayden christensen I'm guessing

Because blogless troll recently noted an uptick in page hits when Hayden Christensen's name is mentioned in a blog post, I decided to look at the most successful search results that brought people to this site. I've only had google analytics tracking my pages for a few weeks, but the results are interesting. If you've got no life whatsoever.

I'm listing these in order of "most successful" using the number of page views per visit that each search term generated.

  • dooh nibor bush
    Imagine my astonishment when I found on the fourth page of search results for this term that I actually had a post with that odd phrase in the title: dooh nibor goes to Washington. And ha, ha, it took me reading the entire post to remember what "dooh nibor" was.
  • arm cast
    I went fifteen pages into the search results and never saw my site listed. Someone was really desperate for something.
  • thema literary
    Yay! A magazine in which I was published brought people to my site!
  • whose hair
    OK, whatever. Certainly not my hair, as I have none.
  • "n is for nate, who was dragged down by the squid"
    I love the possibilities of this one. What was going through this searcher's mind that they would find this phrase, exactly as typed?
And some other random selections:
  • uncle wiggly board game skeezix
  • five different versions of Tiffany Roberts
  • four different versions of star wors
  • three different versions of sock in his mouth
  • pictures of charlie baltimore with pink hair
  • large mug for doctors
  • three versions of gwendolyn rice
  • i miss veronica veronica dead and gone
  • greyhound ate a quarter coins
And of course multiple versions of corner kick, pjd, and haiku.


bluesugarpoet said...

Wait until you hear what brings people to my blog:

#1 I am a terrible person
#2 Best student poem
#3 Post-menstrual

Yes, all more than you needed to know about me.

Blogless Troll said...

Hey, we should make a list of celebrities and do some name dropping experimentation to see who brings the most hits. I tried Brad Pitt once, but nothing to show for it. He's probably too old. I'm guessing young, marginally talented actors is the way to go. And we could get a few more people to do it, you know, pool our resources so to speak. It'd be like SETI@home.

Blogless Troll said...

Just occurred to me, I'm not sure why we should do it, but the answer will probably reveal itself once we collect the data.

bluesugarpoet said...

that is a fantastic idea!

once i posted a picture of Jesse Ventura sporting the fu-manchu beard, and a podcast host almost read my blog post on his show. He even linked to my blog. The best part of this story is that it was a show made for and hosted by transvestites. cool, eh?

PJD said...

I think the problem with Brad Pitt is that there are so many highly linked sites with his name on them that a simple name drop does no good.

"B" list stars, particularly vapid ones with straight teeth and/or visible cleavage, are probably best. Or mid-major sports stars. You'd think Danica Patrick might be a good one in the Indy offseason perhaps.

We should get the whole gang together and round-robin a google bomb. We could take turns name-dropping a major celebrity and all link to each other using the same anchor code, thereby raising the results for our pages in that name.

Why? Because of course we have nothing better to do. And maybe it'll make us feel young again.

Now watch, I bet the Google Police show up because I mentioned google bomb in this comment. I wonder if they'll send my fingerprints off to Washington and enshrine them in a study in black and white in some little folder.

Robin S. said...

I'd never heard of a Google deal before- and I'm not yet Googlable. But I'll change that in a heartbeat if we're gonna do this thing together. Just tell me. I'm in. Sounds fun!

writtenwyrdd said...

*doggie head tilt*

I still love how medieval porn gave so many hits to Bernita's site, and then mine. I now give it to you. Heh.

Ello - Ellen Oh said...

It should come as no surprise to you that the number one search that people find my blog through is anything relating to Farts.

WriterKat said...

I love the analysis. What random information. But by far my favorite is Uncle Wiggley's Board Game.

PJD said...

yeah, I think I'd rather have people coming to my site because of Skeezix than because of farts or medieval porn. People actually search for medieval porn? I wonder if this post will hit the sweet spot for people looking for hayden christensen starring in medieval porn. There's gotta be someone searching for that. In fact, I bet the domain name is already taken.