Yes, I pay for a service that lets me send marketing messages to you! And I can't turn off those marketing messages! Isn't life wonderful?
If you've read my blog recently, then you have way too much free time. That, and you know that I love the ability to snap a photo with my camera phone and blog it immediately with a little bit of text that I painstakingly poke out at a rate far slower than my 300 baud modem back in college. But I hate the stupid marketing text Verizon automatically tacks on to the end of each message. If I emailed a photo from my phone to you, you would get the text also. If I blog it, the text shows up in my blog. It's something like this: "This message was sent to you via the magic and wonder of the outstanding awesome terrific Verizon service. Find out how you, too, can be one of the cool people! Click here!!!!!!!!" (I'm paraphrasing.)
Well, I emailed Verizon to ask how to turn off that awful spam marketing shit. Guess what? I can't! Even though I pay for the service! (OK, technically my company pays for it, but that's just accounting.)
Here is the surprisingly chipper nose-thumbing I got from their customer "service" department. (I think "customer service" here means "happy people who say 'no' a lot.")
Dear Peter Dudley,They are just SOOO happy to get my valuable feedback, which will be passed along to Marketing. What this means: "I am stuck in a shit job where I can't actually do anything about your complaint, but you're right, this asinine text is the work of the evil ghouls in the Marketing Department, so I'll send them your note, but don't expect it to do any good because there's no accountability for the happiness of the customer in this lame company."
Thank you for your excellent question regarding the Verizon Wireless tag at the end of your e-mailed picture messages. My name is [name withheld for the blog], and I am able to assist you.
I am sorry, but at this time we are unable to block these messages from appearing at the end of your messages.
I will be sure pass your comment and dissatisfaction onto our Marketing Department for review
Peter, I thank your for your valuable feedback today. I want you to know that we appreciate your business and thank you for using Verizon Wireless. Should you have additional questions, please reply to this e-mail.
[name withheld for the blog]
But [name withheld for the blog] sure did use a lot of nice words to tell me I'd be more effective setting myself on fire, didn't he?