February 29, 2008

it's all about the hit count, isn't it?

Blogging is really backwards sometimes.

In the real world, people reciprocate when others invite them over. Bob and Martha invite you over for dinner, you reciprocate. If you have them over like two or three times in a row, you eventually say screw you, Bob and Martha, you freeloading ingrates. This ain't a soup kitchen, you know.

Blogs are the opposite. Bob won't bother to come to your blog if you don't go over to his a few dozen times first. Then he drops by and says, "Hi, great blog, ha ha ha you really made me laugh" when you actually posted about how your 18-year-old lap dog just died in your arms and you cried for six days straight. Bob's not paying too much attention. So screw Bob anyway. Who needs him?

I guess what I'm trying to say is this: Bob, you suck.

Wait, maybe that's not what I'm trying to say. Sorry, Bob. I hope you come back. I could use the hits to make me feel relevant. But since you're not paying attention anyway, ha ha ha, I hope I made you laugh.

What I'm really trying to say is, why do people read a whole blog post and then not comment? I mean, you invested the time to visit, you read the words. Why not throw little good time after bad and drop a few words on the lonely blogger who thinks no one ever visits? It's not like there's a standard you have to live up to. It's not like you actually have to think before commenting. Look at Bob.

But it doesn't bother me. I have one of those hit counter things, and it even emails me my weekly summary. But I don't know how to use it. Site meters are the ultimate self esteem indicator. There are two types of people who obsess over them: People who have revenue tied to hit counts, and people who have self-esteem tied to hit counts. Everyone else who blogs realizes that they're basically whispering into a hurricane.


Blogless Troll said...

Hi, Pete. Great blog! Ha ha ha! You really made me laugh. Sorry to hear about your lap dog. Okay, well, see ya!

Blogless Troll said...

Good post Pete. And I'll admit it. I don't always post comments after reading blog posts. A lot of times I'm reading them in between things at work and don't have much time anyway. Other times I can't think of anything intelligent sounding to say so I won't comment. I guess I could just say "good post" or "neener neeener" or something like that. And I don't think I would be brave enough to install one of those hit counters, even if I knew how they worked.

Lily said...

I like "neener neener".

I would like to think that there are more people who read my blog than actually comment, so I like to let the non-commenting slide. Probably because I am delusional.

"Oh yeah, I got tons of readers...they just don't make comments...they're uh...shy...yeah, that's the ticket. I cater to the shy reader."

Anonymous said...

Damn, the troll beat me to the punch line.

I completely didn't understand this post. I never obsess about site visitors. I totally don't have my dashboard on my bookmarks bar. I don't ever click it - twelve, seventeen, thirty-two times a day - to see if someone's (finally) left a comment. I have no self-esteem issues tied to comments. Whatev.

(Oh, well, maybe I have a teensy problem. But nothing that checking my blog won't fix....)

Great last line, btw. As I'd expect from a great writer!

Anonymous said...

BTW - do you mind if I link you?

PJD said...

Thanks for visiting.

BT, you have risen above the noise and I love to read your posts. Didn't comment on the dolphin one, though. Frankly, I didn't know what to say.

Personally, I'm astonished any time anyone comments on one of my posts. I figure the only people who read them stumble here through Google looking for something else.

Oh, and for the record, I would be happy for anyone to link to me, even David Duke. OK, well maybe not everyone.

Chris Eldin said...

OMG! LOL at BT!!

Yeah, I used to be a blog Ho.

Will tell you about it, but I have some lurking to do elsewhere...
also gotta check that sitemeter!!

Seriously, though, I used to check site meter almost every day. I don't do that now. It's a time suck (but seeing what people googled to get to me is quite hilarious)

Oh, I used to go to other sites and nab other bloggers' visitors. THat was part of being a Ho. Like Aerin might be a nice person. And Ch@ndy. hahahahaa!

Gotta go.

Anonymous said...

Oh, this is sad, but so, so true. I, too, am endlessly frustrated by all the times I visit others' blogs and try to leave thoughtful comments and they never bother to reciprocate the visit. In fact, I visit my commenters' links before I go out finding other blogs most of the time. It's really hard to stand out, isn't it? And I almost always comment. I don't comment when a) I genuinely have nothing to say (which, according to my family, happens all to rarely!) b) when I don't have the time (which is rare because I try to make sure my blog-reading time includes a chance to comment) c) when it is made way too difficult or d) when there are already so many commenters that I think that my comment will be lost and/or unappreciated.

As for finding people to comment on your own blog, here's my secret: find a blog you like and with an audience that's similar to what you would like to see for your own. Then go to the comments section and follow the links to the various commenters. After all, you know that they comment, or they wouldn't have commented on that particular blog. And since you have similar content, maybe they'll like your blog, too. I find that after I do this, my hit count goes way up. (And by the way, I found you using this method while on Nathan Bransford's blog.)

So there you go. One mighty long comment. ;-)

Anonymous said...

Great idea Booklady! See you all at your blogs later. ;)

I NEVER look at my sitemeter.

More than 20 times a day, that is.

BTW, Someone found my blog today by googling "Man Boobs." Makes you kind of curious, eh?

Sandra Cormier said...

I have lots of lurkers, too. I signed up with Google Analytics just a month ago and figured out how to actually use it. I was surprised at the number of visits versus comments.

I'm not sure if it makes me feel better that they're visiting, or worse that they're not commenting.

Thanks for dropping by my blog, Pete!

Anonymous said...

I've given up trying to figure out why people don't comment. I have a group of VERY loyal lurkers. As in, people whose hits I have been tracking almost as long as I've had a blog and they have NEVER, not once, commented.

It's crazy, dude.

I still had to laugh at the "look at bob" line :)

Linda C. McCabe said...


I read a lot of blogs each day, and well, I only comment when I think I have something of substance to say to add to a conversation.

I won't post a comment as if it were merely a cyber-guestbook, but I do try to at least check out the blogs of those who comment on my blog to see what kind of blog they have.

Because well, reciprocation is the polite thing to do.



PJD said...

Chris: I hope you do attract some of the people here over to your blog. It never hurts to have another blog party with a big celebrity, though!

booklady: I actually don't try to attract or retain readers. Frankly, that makes me nervous. Performance anxiety, I guess. I just hope people stumble on what I've written and enjoy it. And now I'm curious what I said on Nathan's blog that brought you over here!

BSP: "man boobs"? LOL, it was probably from some comment that Ch@ndy left on your blog, wasn't it?

chumplet: Amen. What, exactly, does it mean if people come and read something but don't comment? Did they hate it? They hated it, didn't they. I knew they'd hate it.

tc: maybe I'll have to start checking my hit counter to see if I have "loyal lurkers." Hey, maybe that'd be a good name for a punk band.

Linda: Feel free to treat my blog as a cyber-guestbook!

Anonymous said...

pjd, I don't even remember what you wrote on Nathan's blog that brought me here. I'm always on the lookout for more blogs, though, because I like variety. And I especially like blogs by others who are interested in reading and writing, since those are my interests, which is probably why I was visiting Nathan's commenters. As for an audience, the thought of building one makes me nervous, too. I try to ignore it, but it can be hard. Still, I look at it as good practice for if a blogger wants to be published someday. I think that blogging can teach people a lot about promotion, networking, etc. Which is good, because I've never been great at either; they require too much confidence!

And bsp, I LOVE to look at what brings people to my site. The searches are always so weird. I'm certain they never leave satisfied.

WriterKat said...

You're cool. That's what I got to say. and very funny. You pulled me in by your great poetry, especially haiku's but I also stay for the wry humor. (& plus you visit me too, so in that sense, you are related to Bob).

Anyway, now I know about site stats. I hadn't thought of that piece. One more thing to obsess about. We used to go into our (business) website stats all the time, thousands of hits until we realized 99.99% of them were robots. bummer.

Chris Eldin said...

Chumplet... hahahaha!! I think Paca got similar hits? Or was it naked deer hunting? I forgot.

But the good news is that the more we say man boobs
man boobs
man boobs

The more people will come here


(p.s. Just kidding about the ho excursion, Peanut. I kicked that habit a long time ago!)

PJD said...

caryn, I hope you got my email. My webmail client that I use at work is flaky.

kat, you think I'm cool? Cool, yeah. Thanks!

Chris, how exactly did you decide on Peanut for a nickname for me? My fraternity nickname was Bambi, believe it or not. No, it was not some weird cross-dressing pornography thing (great, what kind of search hits will I get for that) but because I had (have?) big, brown eyes like a doe.